Fashion

Clothes are clothes. Never ever refer to them as fashion. It is a mistake. It is also a one word definition for something you can't afford and wouldn't be caught dead anyway.

Buy yourself a good suit in a classic style and it will last you a lifetime. Never buy a cheap suit! Your bargain will not be acceptable even at funerals except perhaps on a corpse.

White shoes, white waist belts and gold chains can only be worn if neither of your parents speaks English.

The Rockstar look. Definitely a NO-NO! A Rockstar dresses like a 6 year old who has been allowed to go crazy in his Big sister's wardrobe. You know what I mean... leopard skin, pixie boots, all the belts, all the bangles, leather jackets and etc. More often than not he ends up looking like one of the Village People or all the Village People simultaneously. Be warned.

How many earrings you wear is entirely up to you but remember, too much enthusiasm in this area and you'll end up looking like a Masai Transvestite.
Which side you wear the earrings make no difference at all. Most people have trouble telling right from left anyway. Then again, while wearing an earring in your left ear might not reveal your sexual preferences, it could help you remember that it's your left ear.

Hairstyles

Your hair  is the stuff that frames your head and it can go a long way to improving or hiding the disaster that it sits on. Unfortunately, it is treated like some unwanted parasitic growth or even worst like a fashion accessory to be tortured into the likeness of whatever retarded pop star rules the roost for the moment.

Unless you already look like Pete Burns from the pop group Dead or Alive, wearing your hair like he does will not only look anymore like him, it will just make you look like a marinated Roast Duck. 

The perfect job for aging heterosexuals, these hairdressers will take 3 hours to make you look like you just had sex with a car-wash. Because they are so groovy, so creative, so ...heterosexual. Now the Indian Barbers are pushed into extinction ( a very good example Lily Hairdresser) because your girlfriends have finally badgered you into getting a haircut by these fabulous hairdressers. The slightest disrespect on your part can be punished by making you look like they have cut your hair with a knife and a fork. 

Speaking of which I've gotta get a haircut now. Signing off!

Here's a video from youtube of Pete Burns in 1984

AND


a video of him in 2003 ( God have mercy ) Also, noticed he has a hotdog attached to his lips. So so groovy.