Redeem yourself NOW!

Seriously now, we are not utterly hopeless and irredeemably butt ugly. We may doubt this statement when we look in the mirror and we may not even bring ourselves to look straight into the mirror but this doesn't mean all is lost. No.. Just that we have a long way to go. There is still hope.

Remember the only person who can affect the way we look is Ourselves. If we don't give a flyin' f*ck about the way we look then we will probably never get a flyin' fu*k or any other kind and perhaps an Inflatable or a Blow Up Doll is more our style.

If you can see room for improvements then read on...

our Face

Very few of us have flawless complexions. In fact, most of us tend towards nightmarish greasy crater farms, aggravated by the enthusiastic abuse of alcohol, junk food, ciggies and drugs. But this is no cause for despair. Modern science has been very active in this area. Welcome to the 21st century ladies and gentlemen.

Women have always had an unfair advantage here. They can whack a wide range of cosmetics, finish the whole mess off with a few coats of hi gloss cover -ups which in turn looks like they had layered 20 kilograms of flour on their face and voila! a new possibly attractive goddess or even a faux pas like the pic below. 

Make-up though is not suggested for Men. Seriously and I mean IT unless they wanna look like Boy George / Pete Burns but science has come up with an alternative cosmetics for men. They come in many kinds of eerie lotions and wonder tonics that usually work miracles ( and I don't mean Clearasil ya). But then again if you are that butt ugly, no matter what you do to your face, it will never help. Besides, how can you polish shit?

Now you see what I mean? Anyway, ask your girlfriend or if you haven't gotten that far, you can try asking your sister. Failing that, Boy George and Pete Burns answer emails.

We reply Mails!